The Breaking Point

My due date is 3 days away and I finally blew thru all of the frustration I've been having around this pregnancy. Just being at the end and realizing that really any day now, this little baby will come into this world and change everything I have ever known is a little overwhelming and even a little scary at times. Being just a few days shy of 40 weeks pregnant is by no means comfortable. The baby has definitely dropped since the last time I wrote and feels like a beach ball at the bottom of my stomach. He's just hanging out probably super cramped in my small uterus but he's liking it because there are no signs of him coming out any time soon. For the most part I have not been excessively complaining about being pregnant, it is such a gift to be pregnant, much less have a healthy fetus growing, so complaining about being uncomfortable is really pointless for the most part. Anyone who has been pregnant knows what it feels like at this point and anyone who has not, men included, can certainly show some empathy towards those of us in this situation. Being a first time mom I think adds another layer to all of these feelings. In addition to being uncomfortable and just plain wanting to be done and meet my little baby, I am worried about actually caring for this baby, what do I do with this baby?? I have little baby experience and have been told your "mother's instinct" will just kick right in, but there is still some trepidation around that for me. Its a whole new world and it is scary. Am I going to be a good Mom? Will I really know what to do? How will my baby turn out because of what I teach him? And then there is the whole issue of labor. I have no idea what to expect. I don't even know if I've felt a real contraction yet. . .when will my water break? Will it break on its own or at the hospital with assistance? How am I going to make it thru labor? Will the epidural really take the pain away? How bad will the pain even be?? When is this all going to get started?? So there are a LOT of questions running thru my mind right now and inching closer and closer to that due date with no baby is not helping. Certainly being told what I should try to do to induce labor also is not helping. At first it was fun to hear everyone's suggestions but now I have had enough. If the baby goes past the due date, he goes past. That is actually a very realistic option. . .more than half of all babies born go beyond their due date and first time moms especially are more likely to go past. So right there its safe to say I will probably go past. Probably even more so because the Dr was so concerned he would be so small and come so early because of the cord issue, this baby has to prove that wrong also! I've been hearing about how my husband's mother happened to eat White Castle and then go into labor shortly thereafter. I really don't care. I've been hearing about this for probably the last 3 weeks at least. I have politely told my husband's father that I will not be eating any White Castles. I think those things are so disgusting and I'm just not going to do that to myself. But he just keeps on and keeps on and then got Mike's mom to join in. No certain food causes someone to go into labor and its blatant stupidity and ignorance to think certain foods would cause labor. If that were really the case, then there would never be a "late" baby and there would be no need for medical inducement around the 40th week. Its just ridiculous illogical thinking. The baby will come when he is meant to come. No matter what I eat or try to do, I have no say on the matter. The only person that does is the Dr if he decides I need to be induced. Its been absolutely irritating to the nth degree listening about this White Castle garbage. I understand they are probably excited but just lay off. There comes a point where the "trying to help" is no longer helping and is more overwhelming and irritating than anything else. Which is where I am with it now. If you think you are excited, think of how I might feel. I have been growing this baby for 9 months and you don't hear me complaining and asking for every suggestion under the sun to get this guy out. I haven't even asked my Dr if I could be induced. I'd rather have him come out when he is good and ready and healthy rather than come out early and have something be wrong. I can't wait until he is here and the novelty of him wears off for certain people and they just go back to minding their own damn business. There's a reason you are where you are and this child isn't going to change that.